my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize