I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize