I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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