My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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