dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize