did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize