I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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