i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
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