Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize