I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
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I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
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Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
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