if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
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