You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize