long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize