but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
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STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
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After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
my poor anus
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
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