he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
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