Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory http://tfl.nu/s661
  Replies (15) Good night (3942) Bad night (525) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league? http://tfl.nu/urmj
  Replies (15) Good night (2707) Bad night (984) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled. http://tfl.nu/1807
  Replies (164) Good night (9021) Bad night (809) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week. http://tfl.nu/2kmj
  Replies (7) Good night (3508) Bad night (1079) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!

  (1-859): View more from Kentucky

  please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes! (1-859): please elaborate on, "atleast one ear" http://tfl.nu/8j2w
  Replies (20) Good night (6560) Bad night (1227) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (289): View more from Ontario

  Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (289): Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working http://tfl.nu/bi46
  Replies (3) Good night (938) Bad night (3676) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (810): It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team. http://tfl.nu/1zge
  Replies (7) Good night (2849) Bad night (935) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax. http://tfl.nu/bw4v
  Replies (8) Good night (872) Bad night (1686) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Found your dick twin last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): Found your dick twin last night http://tfl.nu/4id4
  Replies (5) Good night (2060) Bad night (660) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  .....a litte

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life (860): .....a litte http://tfl.nu/slo9
  Replies (6) Good night (1087) Bad night (410)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (317): Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios. http://tfl.nu/l40u
  Replies (4) Good night (758) Bad night (366)
• Favorite

  (347): View more from New York

  I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (347): I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know. http://tfl.nu/c9pc
  Replies (4) Good night (523) Bad night (209)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating http://tfl.nu/1tih
  Replies (3) Good night (931) Bad night (164) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  And the results, officer?

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  She's fucked.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle. (978): And the results, officer? (401): She's fucked. http://tfl.nu/1koh
  Replies (6) Good night (935) Bad night (214)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking. http://tfl.nu/8b6a
  Replies (0) Good night (333) Bad night (73)

Randomize