Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
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