Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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