She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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