I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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