I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
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