On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
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