You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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