I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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