is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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