Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize