You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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