On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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