Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
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