we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize