you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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