no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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