after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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