Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I just had sex on a roof
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
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