Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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