Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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