ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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