finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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