I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize