Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
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