Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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