I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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