i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize