i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Randomize