i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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