Texts From Last Night

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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.

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  (202): I want to give you a handjob with my mouth. http://tfl.nu/s0yv
  Replies (25) Good night (1939) Bad night (388) Order T-Shirt
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  (941): View more from Florida

  Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.

  (1-941): View more from Florida

  That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.

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  (941): Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there. (1-941): That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis. http://tfl.nu/r1u9
  Replies (36) Good night (910) Bad night (3358)
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  (905): View more from Toronto

  dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends

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  (905): dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends http://tfl.nu/gaeo
  Replies (16) Good night (1175) Bad night (3037) Order T-Shirt
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.

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  (419): It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo. http://tfl.nu/e5lr
  Replies (4) Good night (511) Bad night (3658) Order T-Shirt
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina

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  (410): no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina http://tfl.nu/z7tk
  Replies (15) Good night (2480) Bad night (972) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  It was confusing and full of hummus

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  (215): It was confusing and full of hummus http://tfl.nu/wxk0
  Replies (13) Good night (1507) Bad night (3008) Order T-Shirt
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  (631): View more from New York

  Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"

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  (631): Strippers tramp stamp says "mom" http://tfl.nu/an62
  Replies (21) Good night (757) Bad night (4386) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin

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  (630): Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin http://tfl.nu/3pnd
  Replies (30) Good night (1070) Bad night (3523) Order T-Shirt
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.

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  (269): I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE. http://tfl.nu/167y
  Replies (20) Good night (3181) Bad night (2628) Order T-Shirt
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..

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  (781): i just added no after every hockey player in my phone.. http://tfl.nu/mdhx
  Replies (13) Good night (2179) Bad night (962) Order T-Shirt
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  (510): View more from California

  You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink

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  (510): You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink http://tfl.nu/uf46
  Replies (3) Good night (2795) Bad night (741) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.

  (1+44): View more from

  When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.

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  (+44): You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man. (1+44): When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree. http://tfl.nu/esvb
  Replies (9) Good night (1562) Bad night (897)
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  (916): View more from California

  Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.

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  (916): Need. Hospital. Physically am floating. http://tfl.nu/j2sm
  Replies (6) Good night (1023) Bad night (458) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious

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  (914): Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious http://tfl.nu/b9mo
  Replies (5) Good night (662) Bad night (377) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.

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  (610): Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol. http://tfl.nu/y192
  Replies (1) Good night (1366) Bad night (308)

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