If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
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