also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
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If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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