Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize