i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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